不要这样
我比你的难过更难过

24/5/2013

The day before i sit for my sejarah and econs exam ,
i study sejarah for whole afternoon and about evening ,
i open my whatsapp group to see what's going on now ,
i said i'm tired ,
and all the 'jiayous' come up ,
but still ,
there's somenone always love to tease me , haha
i smile like a fool to my phone alone in my room ,
how creepy , hahahaha
But i felt the warmth .  :)


Yesterday teacher praise me for no reason ,
i don't know why , haha
he suddenly said : 有你这样一个女儿很不错hor , 懂事 , 不会让父母操心 .
I think my mum will probably 翻白眼 when she see this ! hahaha
Teacher , you will say so it's because you don't know me well , haha
but , it's not because you say so and i have to say something like this
your personalities and your kindness
you are a good teacher
a good daddy who dote on children

and i want to say : Teacher , how i wish you were my dad too .

21/5/2013

Nothing to do , so i just redecorate my blog .
8 months past , i didn't even post a sentence here , haha .

I suppose to be studying now , but i end up sitting in front of my pc .
Well , nothing to said , life is bored , This one and a half year is a 过渡期 for me , but i believe if i can go through with it , i will be more mature . But there's still 6 more months to go , which means i have to continue emo for 6 months .
A feeling of deepest fear towards my future , struggling to get 2.8 or better , 3.0 , see which local U can offer me a place ?
Should i study bussiness or econs in the future like what i do now ? Actually i don't really like econs .
Illustration or Interior design ? Do i really fond of interior design ? The market for interior design is too pack , can i survive ? Can i earn even one cent by becoming a illustrator ? Do i really love drawing ? I can't imagine the day when i totally sick of drawing , lose my passion to it , it's terrible . And if that day come , i think i am just a crap who can't survive in this world .    And i am struggling to become a better me , but how sad i m just an ordinary person , it's too hard for me to become a better 'me' i really want to .
唉，我也只是一介凡夫俗子，什么大器什么风度什么度量什么勇敢什么坚强什么稳重都是骗人的，我根本做不到 . 19岁了我还是吊儿郎当 . 19岁了我还是一样懦弱 .
But , things will turn out to be fine , right ?

'Close eye , hoping for a better life .'